anger; it is a natural human emotion and one that many of us try to suppress. But whether we want to admit it or not, we all struggle to contain our anger at times. And who can blame us? The world is a crazy place to be these days, and there’s a lot to be mad about!
At a Glance: Our Top 5 Picks for Anger Management Books
You are reading: Books to control anger
- rage: a step-by-step guide to overcoming explosive anger – our top pick
- the cow in the parking lot: a zen approach to overcoming anger
- the surprising purpose of anger: beyond anger management: finding the gift
- anger management for dummies
- what to do when your temper flares : a kids’ guide to overcoming problems
But when anger starts to show up too often, it can be a warning sign that it’s time to make a change. being an angry person who quickly loses his temper or becomes enraged is bad for both you and the people around you.
Fortunately, there are so many great tools and helpful tips out there to help all of us with our anger issues. Here’s a list of nine great anger management books to read right away, so you can spend less time hitting the wall and more time accessing your zen.
review of the 9 best books of all time for anger management
1. rage: a step-by-step guide to overcoming explosive anger by ronald potter-efron
Are your angry outbursts more like episodes of pure rage? Or does someone you love frequently exhibit extreme and unpredictable episodes of anger? Having intense anger on a regular basis is extremely damaging, both to the person feeling the emotion and to the other people around them at the time.
Fortunately, this fantastic book by ronald potter-efron contains tons of powerful tools for overcoming extreme anger, all presented in an easy-to-absorb way.
The first thing this book wants you to know is that you are not alone. Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IE) is a recognized disorder characterized by repeated episodes of extraordinary anger, and researchers estimate that about 7% of Americans will experience this condition in their lifetime. that’s a lot of people! And when you also take into account the millions of people who experience less frequent but equally intense bouts of anger, you’ll find that this is an affliction that affects a large proportion of people at some point in their lives.
The second thing this book wants you to know is that help is available. Your angry outbursts can be controlled, calmed, and even eradicated by following Ronald Potter-Efron’s step-by-step guide. divides anger into four separate subcategories. there is ‘survival rage’, which is when we feel anger because of a perceived threat or danger, ‘helplessness rage’ which comes from feeling helpless, ‘abandonment rage’, which is triggered by the fear of losing someone close and, finally, ‘shame rage’, which is triggered when a person feels disrespected for any reason.
potter-efron looks at what happens in the brain during these various types of anger, and then shares helpful tools and methods for stopping these episodes as they arise. he offers a no-nonsense approach that has so far helped thousands of people escape the confines of an angry mind and live a happier life.
2. the cow in the parking lot: a zen approach to overcoming anger by susan edmiston and leonard scheff
What the hell does a cow in a parking lot have to do with anger management, you might ask. Well, imagine yourself in a busy grocery store parking lot, driving around trying to find a space. eventually a spot opens up, but just as you put the car in reverse to claim the space, another driver swoops in and takes it for himself. cue feelings of frustration and even anger, right? Well, now imagine that instead of another driver, she is actually a cow who has shuffled into the parking space and settled in. now, her first reaction is more likely to be bewilderment than anger.
This book takes a new approach to the human emotion of anger. its goal is to train our brain to change the way we see the cause of our anger, frustration, or rage. instead of an insufferable person or situation, it’s nothing more than a docile cow taking up your parking space. that’s a sure way to make you smile instead of rage, right?
Using Buddhist philosophy combined with proven psychology, Susan Edmiston and Leonard Scheff present anger not as a fatal flaw in our constitution, but as a natural way we respond to unfulfilled basic needs or desires.
take the reader step by step through powerful techniques that help calm the mind and reset our psychology so that we no longer exist in default angry mode. instead, you will learn to channel calm through compassion for others.
If you like to take a more spiritual approach to anger management and mental health in general, then this book is a great choice. takes the wisdom of traditional Buddhist practices and shows us how we can harness a little Zen for ourselves to transform rank and frustration into a force for good in the world.
3. The Surprising Purpose of Anger: Beyond Anger Management: Finding the Gift by Marshall B. rosenberg doctorate
When anger strikes, it often comes as a physical sensation. you may feel your face getting hot, your heartbeat racing, your vision narrowing, and you may even see red. and of course a lot of critical and aggravating thoughts flood your mind. Now that you are in full rage mode, you are ready to say or do something that will make the situation worse.
but there is another way. In this book, Marshall B. Rosenberg introduces us to the nonviolent communication (nvc) process, a way we can harness our anger, transform it, and direct it toward a life-enriching purpose.
“every criticism, judgment, diagnosis and expression of anger is the tragic expression of an unmet need”. marshal b. rosenberg
See Also: Mike Lupica – Book Series In Order
rosenberg says that anger is a sign that our needs are not being met and we are disconnected from the things we value. Instead of suppressing our anger or exploding into anger, he shows us how anger can reveal what we need, even at the deepest levels. once we can truly identify what is missing, we can begin to meet those needs in a healthy and constructive way.
Rosenberg’s book breaks down solutions for uncontrolled anger into four fundamental truths. First of all, we must realize that although people or events may trigger our anger, it is our own judgments that are the true underlying cause. Second, when we decide that another person is wrong, we are preventing ourselves from identifying and connecting with our unmet needs. Third, once we understand what we really need, we can identify solutions that are healthy for us and those around us. And finally, Rosenberg teaches us how to create strategies that allow us to satisfy our own needs to transform anger into positive action.
4. anger management for dummies by charles h. Elliot, Laura L. blacksmith and w. doyle nobility
If you love the “for dummies” format, this comprehensive guide to anger management is worth reading. It introduces us to new and easy-to-apply cognitive strategies that help us permanently change an angry mindset.
The premise of the book is that anger is a completely normal and healthy human emotion. but it is also an emotion that can very easily get out of control and become destructive, dangerous and toxic for us and those around us.
Anger Management for Beginners shows us that anger is often a byproduct of other emotions, such as stress, fear, anxiety, and depression. If we learn to look at our thought patterns, we can identify these underlying sources and treat the root cause of our frustration, anger, and outbursts.
Some sections cover specific scenarios that commonly make people angry, for example office rage, road rage, and dealing with angry children and teens. It also includes extensive advice on how to de-escalate angry situations quickly and safely, both for ourselves and for other angry people.
These easy-to-digest tools, tips, and strategies give us everything we need to stop being controlled by anger, so we can live happy, healthy, and fulfilling lives.
5. what to do when her temper flares: a kids’ guide to overcoming anger issues, by dawn huebner and bonnie matthews
Just like adults, children get angry. This very human emotion is programmed in our psyche from the day we are born. But for kids who are having trouble dealing with their anger, it’s important to take a personalized approach. what works for adults might not work as well for a developing child’s brain.
This book is specifically designed to give children the tools they need to control their temper. is packed with interactive activities that teach kids about anger, how to control it, and how to turn that powerful emotion into something positive.
The methods for “turning off anger” in this book allow children to own their emotions without shame or guilt to feel happier, healthier and more fulfilled. Until now, it has helped thousands of families to regain a peaceful and happy home.
6. Beyond Anger: A Guide for Men: How to Break Free from the Clutches of Anger and Get More Out of Life by Thomas J. harbin
Men generally express their anger in different ways than women. they are more likely to express their emotions with physical violence and are less able to process and deal with their emotions than women.
This detailed guide by Thomas J Harbin aims to address the root cause of anger and equip men with the tools they need to process it in healthy ways, so they can be better partners, fathers, coworkers, and bosses.
harbin is a psychologist who specializes in treating male anger. Using research he has collected over many years, he shows men how to leave behind a bitter and angry existence and transform their mindset to live a happier, healthier and more peaceful life.
The book begins by focusing on the symptoms of anger, including suppressed anger, which can manifest as criticism, annoyance, and vindictive behaviors. points out the ways a chronically angry man can affect his family, his friends, and his work environment.
There are also specific exercises aimed at controlling violent impulses, all specifically targeting the male brain. This book will help any man dealing with chronic rage or rage identify when and why anger occurs, and in turn, develop new habits that override angry feelings before they even arise.
7. the anger management workbook for women: a 5-step guide to managing your emotions and breaking the cycle of anger by julie catalano
This practical 5-step guide is designed to help women understand, work with, and control their anger. Much more than men, women tend to approach their anger issues with shame, guilt, and regret, but this book demonstrates how we can free ourselves from these emotions and learn new strategies for managing anger.
breaks down the source of female anger so we can better understand it. it also provides the reader with a doable, easy-to-implement plan that can be immediately put into action.
See Also: How to Read the Bible Chronologically | Books of the Bible in Chronological Order
There is an entire section designed to empower women to engage in assertive conversations, express their needs and get them met. this addresses the root cause of anger issues and ultimately prevents the issue from arising in the first place.
There are tons of interactive worksheets, quizzes, and other activities to help us better understand our own minds and identify what triggers anger outbursts. There are also many tried and tested techniques designed to address our physical and cognitive reactions to angry feelings, so we can deal with them as soon as they arise.
The author also includes stories of other women who have struggled with anger management and shares the tools they used to overcome their issues.
8. why does he do that?: inside the minds of angry, controlling men, by lundy bancroft
Women in angry, abusive relationships often lie to themselves to rationalize their partner’s behavior. they will excuse their husband’s outbursts of anger and often blame themselves.
This book is for those who live with a perpetually angry man. dives deep into the male psyche and exposes the common thought processes and emotional regulation issues that affect many men and, in turn, their families. it teaches us that anger can become a form of abuse that is often overlooked until it becomes unbearable.
lundy bancroft uses his wealth of counseling experience to teach us how to survive, get better, or get out of an abusive relationship. She shows us how to spot the early warning signs of an angry spouse and how to know when it can be fixed and when it can’t.
breaks down nine abusive personality types and discusses various approaches to dealing with each. There is also a chapter on the role of drugs and alcohol in angry and abusive relationships, and a section dedicated to helping people leave a relationship safely, if they choose to do so.
This book teaches us that it is not our fault, and that we are not responsible for the way our partner handles their emotions. empowers those on the receiving end of a man’s anger to overcome these challenging behaviors and see that we have options. sometimes those choices stay with your partner and help them through their difficulties. other times, the best option is to leave.
9. anger: wisdom to cool the flames, by thich nhat hanh
In this insightful book, Vietnamese refugee and Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh shares tools and advice for managing anger. he uses his extraordinary wisdom to share the secrets of a healthy and happy mind. His goal is to help us rebuild our interpersonal relationships and focus our energies on a positive and transformative mindset.
He believes that the source of our unhappiness stems from just three states of mind; wrong knowledge, obsessive desire and anger. and his anger, the most powerful of emotions, which can tear families apart, cripple our mental and physical health, and destroy our spiritual development.
Nobel Peace Prize nominee Hanh shares tools, methods, and advice on how to transform our lives using ancient Buddhist wisdom. His approach is different from many mainstream anger management experts; he focuses on the powerful connection between our personal inner peace and the peace of those around us. he dives deep into the big picture of what anger is, not just for us and our families, but for society as well.
conclusion
Anger is a natural human emotion, but it’s also very easy to let it get out of control. The books on this list are fantastic tools to help us manage our complex emotions and free ourselves from the clutches of anger. they allow us to become better people for ourselves and for those around us.
Check out these other great posts!
10 Must-Read Books for 8th Graders
How do you decide which books to read next?
7 amazing books like lost girl
10 best tablets for reading
See Also: Downloaded Audiobooks Disappeared on iPhone? 3 Ways to Fix It – Coolmuster