Even for a fifth grader, Aidy was energetic. but him today he could barely calm his ungainly limbs from hitting desks and rattling against his chair. she had waited all month to visit her mother in prison, so when her day finally came, she was perfectly prepared in a pink bow and tiny heeled dress shoes. As she stuffed her coat into a messy locker, she confidently explained how her aunt would pick her up early from school and they’d eat crumpled-wrapped hamburgers on the way to see her mother.
as the afternoon progressed, aidy’s anxious restlessness became agitated. When she rang the end-of-school bell, long after she’d missed the opportunity to see her mother, she melted into sobs of disappointment.
You are reading: Children’s books about disappointment
While not every child experiences aidy’s great disappointment at missing a visit from their parents, life is full of disappointments. kids watch in dismay as parents break up or get sick as financial stress means no birthday presents or things just don’t go as planned.
Most teachers agree that managing disappointment is crucial to success in school and as an adult, but supporting students plagued by disappointment can seem complicated. teachers are pressed for time and often feel untrained in the social-emotional support students in crisis need.
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A simple but effective way to help disappointed students is to use bibliotherapy, a technique in which teachers curate literature that guides students toward personal solutions. for a student mourning the loss of a friendship, a teacher might choose a text with a protagonist dealing with a similar disappointment. As the characters in the text learn to manage their emotions and learn new coping skills, the students do too.
The most important aspect of choosing a text to help students deal with disappointment is a story they can relate to. novels are usually a natural choice, but any genre, length, and style can work. a comic with a strong disappointment plot can have the same impact as a piece of historical fiction. If you need a place to start, we suggest a few books below as a place to start.
new kidby jerry craft is an excellent choice for middle graders facing disappointing school changes or sudden life changes. In this newly released graphic novel, protagonist Jordan Banks doesn’t want to change high schools, but his parents insist that he leave their cozy neighborhood for the luxurious halls of Riverdale Academy Day School. upon arrival, there is much to be sad about. jordan doesn’t know anyone, he regularly gets lost on campus and immediately gets kicked out of the cafeteria table he chose. As one of the few black students on campus, Jordan also faces regular microaggressions when teachers call him by the wrong name and classmates overlook his artistic talents and instead assume he’s an athlete. . Give this book to middle graders who can learn from Jordan’s smart approach to handling disappointment, making new friends, and deciding when to stand up for yourself.
For younger students, Anne Sibley O’Brien’s picture book I’m New Here is a great way to explore the disappointments and surprises that come with attending school in a new country. The book follows three immigrant students as they face new challenges instead of giving up in the face of each setback. This book works great as a read aloud to teach students how to support their friends who are facing challenges and disappointments.
Younger students will love Roda Ahmed’s beautifully illustrated book, Mae Between the Stars. Based on the story of Mae Carol Jemison, the first African-American woman in space, the book follows a young Mae who is disappointed when her teacher suggests that she is not cut out to be an astronaut and that she should focus on another profession. easy. . Read this book with little ones who can learn along with Mae as she refocuses on her goals and strives to follow her dream of going to space.
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For a lighter read on responding to disappointment, Jory John’s Bad Seed follows a tiny seed who is horrified to be spit out of someone’s mouth at a baseball game. in reaction to this disappointing turn of events, he turns rude and refuses to wash his hands. This picture book is a perfect way to talk to elementary students about how responses to disappointment affect ourselves and others.
for the middle grade struggling with disappointment related to a friend, sharon draper’s grab out of my mind or rj Palacio’s wonder. both main characters struggle when people let them down, leave them out, or completely ignore them. In both books, the main characters muster the courage to face their disappointment and confront other people’s expectations.
The suggested texts are just a starting point. we suggest keeping a list of books on disappointment to access during particularly difficult times. the important thing to consider is how the characters or problems relate to the students.
robin harris teaches gifted and talented courses at an elementary school in tulsa, oklahoma. you can find her curled up with a picture book at her local independent bookstore. marissa king is the chief of staff at teaching & oklahoma’s leading initiative and former tulsa public school teacher. she still visits former students at lunch.
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