updated June 14, 2022.
If you’ve signed up for our book club, you’ll know we’re featuring sylvia & marsha start a revolution by joy ellison, the bare naked book by kathy stinson, introducing teddy by jessica walton and when aidan becomes a brother by kyle lukoff. Since you probably loved these books and are craving more, here are more of our favorites to help your child understand gender as a spectrum rather than a binary categorization.
You are reading: Children’s books about gender identity
To help you find what you’re looking for, we’ve divided this list into three parts:
- informational books on gender and pronouns,
- transition stories, and
- books on gender presentation and breaking gender stereotypes.
part 1: informative books on gender & pronouns
We know that gender is a social construct and that socialization begins at a very young age. Instead of shying away from these discussions and allowing society and mainstream media to shape our children’s perceptions, these books help form fundamental understandings about bodies and identity.
the book of pronouns
- ideal for children from 0 to 3 years old
a board book for our youngest children with wonderful illustrations of all kinds of people. there’s no way to tell someone’s pronouns unless you ask them, so go for it!
What we love: This book is simple and has no narrative. It’s perfect for young children to discover and figure things out for themselves.
Things to Know: This book is a light-hearted introduction to people and their pronouns, and how gender expression doesn’t always match someone’s gender identity.
the naked book
- ideal for children from 2 to 5 years old
finally, a book that really reveals everything, with a play on words. The Naked Book normalizes and celebrates all body types through stunning illustrations and simple questions that ask readers to look at and celebrate their own bodies!
What We Love: The inclusivity of this anatomy book is off the charts and allows readers to see bodies as beautiful. we appreciate how the book exposes readers to bodies that are rarely on display and teaches love for all.
Things to Know: This book was recently updated from its 1986 version to include more diverse people and gender presentations. Although the Naked Naked Book was a novel when it was first published, the author recognized how outdated her work had become. she’ll appreciate your 2021 author note, which shares insights like why they decided to feature ambiguous genitalia. we love that this title serves as a reminder on our shelves to never stop challenging our thinking and increasing our understanding.
your whole body: from your head to your toes, and everything in between!
- ideal for children from 3 to 6 years old
once your child is ready for a slightly broader description than the naked book contains, take a look at their entire body! is an inclusive children’s book about the whole body and helps adults teach their children the names of genitalia in a comfortable and natural way by seamlessly weaving together explanations and illustrations as the book explores the body.
What We Love: This book contains full explanations, illustrations, and labels for all major body parts, including the genitals. the text and illustrations describe and show different appearances and abilities, and we love that the book doesn’t use gendered pronouns when describing genitals or any of the characters depicted.
Things to Know: The author of this book is a mother who was looking for a book to help her teach her son to accurately name and describe his own body parts, but couldn’t find one, so she wrote it herself after consulting with child safety experts, pediatricians, gender specialists, and educators.
what are your words?
- ideal for children from 3 to 8 years old
Follow Ari around her neighborhood as they try to find their words in this sweet and accessible introduction to gender-inclusive pronouns that is perfect for readers of all ages.
What We Love: We love that this book shows how different pronouns make the main character feel (how some don’t feel good and some feel good, described in so many other words). each person has words that include but are not limited to their pronouns, completing each person we meet as a multidimensional person, not just pronouns or gender.
Things to Know: This book includes some neopronouns and ideas on how to ask people what their words are.
It feels good to be yourself: a book on gender identity
- ideal for children from 3 to 6 years old
Following a group of friends, this picture book shows the many forms of gender identity. It Feels Good to Be Yourself is a wonderfully simple book about gender normalizing children’s experiences.
What We Love: This book is very simple and explains the terms transgender, cisgender, and non-binary using accessible language and understandable examples. this story validates our feelings about ourselves and is a great starting point for discussing how the gender assigned to us at birth is not always correct.
Things to know: The author of this book is the father of a transgender child, and the illustrator identifies as non-binary.
what makes a baby?
- Ideal for children from 4 to 8 years old
Perfect for the age when kids ask a lot of ‘how’ and ‘why’ questions, what makes a baby caters to youngsters who are curious about babies and where they come from.
What We Love: The text uses gender-neutral language, such as “people with eggs” and “people with sperm,” expanding our ideas about conception. the illustrations reflect this deliberately inclusive approach through smyth’s bold multicolored silhouettes with no gender-differentiated body parts.
See Also: ❯ The 7 Best Photoshop Books: 2022 Full Guide
Things to Know: A great book choice for kids who know someone who is expecting or has a new sibling coming soon.
the wheel of gender
- Ideal for children from 7 to 10 years old
sex is a fun word: a book about bodies, feelings and you
- ideal for children 8 to 10 years old
An award-winning comic, sex is a funny word provides a comprehensive look at what the word “sex” means, in particular, to a diverse cast of characters. Exploring gender, bodies, and sexual orientation, this book discusses respect, boundaries, and safety in an open and thoughtful way that facilitates equally open and thoughtful conversations
What We Love: The four narrators, Zai, Cooper, Mimi, and Omar, ask a lot of questions that are helpful for young readers to consider and answer. the explanations provided in the book are genderless (which is great when it comes to body parts)!
Things to know: This book is not just about the gender spectrum. As the author points out at the beginning, this book is meant to be read over a long period of time, with room for questions and discussion.
part 2: books about transgender children and the transition process
gender does not mean sex, however, we live in a world that equates them anyway. the books in this section show kids living their genre! the transition process takes so many different forms. These titles exemplify the representation that transgender children (and adults) deserve, and the exposure that cisgender children (and adults) need to celebrate and defend their peers.
introducing the teddy
- ideal for children from 3 to 6 years old
Many children can relate to having a stuffed animal they love. This book lovingly challenges how we can make assumptions about someone’s (or stuffed animal’s) gender identity and encourages the acceptance of loving people and stuffed animals just the way they are.
What We Love: This book gently demonstrates to young readers what it’s like to share who you are and accept others as they are.
Things to Know: The author identifies as queer and wrote this story after noticing that her children’s bookshelves “didn’t reflect the diversity of her family.” we love this story and the only thing we would change is the title “introducing tilly” as that is the teddy bear’s true identity.
calvin
- Ideal for children from 4 to 8 years old
Calvin comes out as transgender to his family and worries what people will think when he returns to school after transitioning. his family is nothing but affirmation and helps her through his concern with love and empathy.
What We Love: What kids really care about is feeling accepted for who they really are, and this book fully exemplifies that.
Things to Know: Vanessa Ford wrote this book with the help of her transgender son Jr. We love “own voice” stories like this one!
my rainbow
- Ideal for children from 4 to 8 years old
my rainbow is our favorite children’s book that normalizes and celebrates an autistic trans girl. the love and affirmation that the trinity family expresses throughout the book is beautiful.
What We Love: Trinity co-wrote this story with her mom, making it an authentic and easy story for kids to understand. we believe that every family should have at least one book with a transgender protagonist, and my rainbow is so affirming that we believe it should be on every shelf in every classroom and home.
Things to Know: At Little Feminist, we deeply believe that Black trans disabled lives matter, and we are indebted to Trinity and her mother Deshauna (who is also queer!) for write this amazing book. filled with so many important openings for conversations about autism, the history of hair in the black community, what it means to be transgender.
47,000 accounts
- ideal for children from 6 to 9 years old
Payton is a Lakota boy who gets a little help from his family members and a two-spirited elder to express their two-spirited self and dance at a powwow in outfits that fully represent themselves.
What We Love: Two-spirit representation is hard to find in children’s books, and it shows how to support and show up for our loved ones and community members. this book made us cry!
Things to Know: We wish throughout this book Peyton was referred to as her name or a different pronoun instead of “her” after Peyton expressed that they were two spirits .
They call me a mix
- Ideal for children from 7 to 10 years old
They Call Me Mix is a bilingual (English and Spanish) children’s book about what it means to be a Latinx transgender person in a culture where gender categories can make life difficult. lourdes has a hard time even imagining where they will fit in until they find a queer and trans community where they feel empowered to reinvent the language that works for them and we see them doing fun things every day with friends.
What We Love: The last few pages show the main character, now an adult, explaining that he became a teacher (and wrote this autobiographical book). it’s a rare and necessary glimpse (at least in children’s picture books) of a non-binary child who became a successful adult.
Things to Know: The author, Lourdes Rivas, is a kindergarten teacher at a public elementary school.
melisa
- ideal for children 8 to 12 years old
Follow a young trans woman through her experience of publicly becoming her true self.
What We Love: This is a great book for transgender youth to read a character that represents them. It’s also a wonderful read for cisgender youth, to help them support their transgender peers.
See Also: 10 Best Books About Life to Help You Find Your Meaning – Lifehack
Things to Know: This book was previously published under the title “george”, but the author changed the title in 2021 to better reflect the needs of the main character.
too bright to see
- ideal for children 8 to 12 years old
The author of When Aidan Became a Brother has written a wonderful ghost story focused on three main themes: gender identity, grief, and ghostly apparitions, through the eyes and experiences of the main character, bug .
What We Love: This book is about an 11-year-old boy finding his identity, all the while dealing with grief and family relationships, plus a resident ghost!
Things to Know: This book is about the main character’s grief over the death of his uncle, which can be a complex subject for some children to read independently.
part 3: books on gender presentation and breaking gender stereotypes
gender presentation is a visual symbol of how people identify themselves in the world. however, we know that the way someone expresses themselves on the outside (choice of clothing, hairstyle, makeup, etc.) does not always coincide with their gender identity or pronouns. It is important to remember and teach our children that the only way to know someone’s gender identity is to ask them. we recognize that people may wear clothing that breaks gender stereotypes; a child with a skirt does not make him lgbtq +. clothes have no gender, despite false and unfair stereotypes assigned to them.
bodies are cool
- ideal for children from 2 to 8 years old
an inclusive book that highlights the diversity and beauty of the human body, including scars, prosthetics, skin colors, and all manner of body shapes and types.
What We Love: The text does not assign gender to any of the people in the illustrations; when we read bodies are cool, we point out things we notice about groups of people or individuals, and change the pronouns we use to show that anyone can look anyway (example: “he [pointing to an individual ] has scars on his chest. maybe he had chest surgery to affirm his gender identity” or “look at this person, they are having so much fun dancing with their friends!”)
Things to Know: Every time we reread this book, we notice new things in the illustrations and can go deeper into discussions about body positivity with our kids.
none
- ideal for children from 3 to 7 years old
In a world full of blue bunnies and yellow birds, a baby is born who is neither a bunny nor a bird. In the land of this and that, what about those who don’t fit either?
What We Love: With colorful images and clear, simple text, this book brings comfort to those who feel like they don’t fit in. the rabbits and birds ask what the creature is and he replies “I am both!” the rabbits and birds then reply, “no, you’re not either!” what a perfect opportunity for children to learn that being neither can also mean being both.
Things to Know: This story allows you to tailor your conversation with your child to a variety of situations, such as what it means to be gender non-conforming, intersex, or genderqueer. the story also lends itself to discussions of multiracial families!
annie’s plaid shirt
- by stacy davids, illustrated by rachael balsaitis
- ages 3 to 8
It’s annie’s uncle’s wedding! annie plans to wear his favorite plaid shirt, the one he always wears, every day. annie’s mom says that girls wear dresses to weddings, but the dresses make annie feel like she’s not herself. what will she do?
What We Love: annie’s plaid shirt addresses how her mother cares for annie and wonders if she made the right decision by asking her to wear a dress. this shows that parents and adults are not always sure of themselves, which presents a good opportunity to talk to her little reader about this topic.
Things to Know: Annie’s Plaid Shirtcontains relatively simple text and lacks character and story depth. the ending, while mostly satisfying, feels a bit forced. however, we have kept this book on our list because there are very few books about girls who come across as masculine in their choice of clothing. Is it for a boy or a girl? of s. bear bergman is another option if you are looking for these specific stories in the market.
Unique like me/Unique like me
- by laurin mayeno, illustrated by robert liu-trujillo
- ages 4 to 8
The school pageant is coming up and Danny knows exactly what he wants to be: a princess! she even she has the perfect dress in mind. The problem is that she can’t find it!
What We Love: With the help of his mom, Danny creates the dress from his imagination, sewing a curtain and a bathrobe. when the day of the parade arrives, some children comment on her outfit and claim that they have never seen a princess child before. Danny humorously relieves the tension by replying that she has never seen a walking butterfly or a talking pineapple.
Things to Know: There are a host of other books that address the fact that boys like stereotypically “girly” things. we liked sparkle boy, which would be especially useful for kids who have a hard time understanding their sibling’s introduction. my princess boy, morris micklewhite and the mandarine dress, 10,000 dresses and jacob’s new dress are other reading options. Our first choice is one of a kind, like me because Danny is free to be himself and the book doesn’t focus on overcoming bullying like other books on this topic do. While it’s always important to share stories about overcoming bullying, normalizing acceptance can be just as powerful!
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well there you have it, 9 amazing books to keep the themes of introducing teddy and when aidan becomes brother alive and well in your home. Be sure to tell us your family’s favorites!
Do you want more? Join the little feminist book club. we send new favorites to our members every month!
See Also: 6 Free & Cheap Ways to Read Great Books – The (mostly) Simple Life